Walks at the Fair

Every fall season we have the Arizona State fair for a few weeks, usually it occurs just before my birthday or even sometimes on my birthday. For the last 5 years or maybe longer, I will make the trip there by myself. It has become a birthday tradition for me. I always park in the same lot, walk the same path, go through the same entrance, buy a beer, get Navajo tacos, and sit and eat as I people watch. I'm in a daze, as I feel the beer run through me and my stomach full. I walk around and watch people go on rides. I often take photos and try to go when the sun begins to set, allowing for more beauty. I feel happiness, watching the kids run around, adults eating food on a stick, the smiles and screams of the thrill riders. I really take enjoyment vicariously through others. I have the empathy that works in such a way that this is just enough for me to enjoy. I don't like the rides myself except for one or two. Thus, I take the thrill watching others ride. This last visit made me really think about my empathy in this context. I thought, I have been doing this for years now, it's so routine, almost always the same except slightly different, yet the enjoyment is still pure. However, if you generalize this, apply it to contexts/environments other than the State Fair, it still reveals that I enjoy watching others have fun, blissful fun.

I have tried to notice my moments of happiness more, to know when I'm feeling it and what is causing it. It results in feeling of the air being kicked out of me, and often times the feeling of wanting to cry, an overwhelming feeling so good it translates to tears.
Some instances I have taken note of are when walking around the state fair, riding in the work vehicle on the way to Fountain Hills (a beautiful view), the sunrise, the sunset, a passage of a book, solitude, watching others enjoy themselves, kids playing peacefully, dogs, eating amazing food, playing board games with friends, watching a thoughtful movie, learning something new, having moments that make me reflect on all I have done to get where I am, finishing a book, walking in nature with headphones, accomplishing a task, reaching a goal, expressing myself unapologetically, a pure genuine moment with a friend or two, meaningful hugs, capturing moments in nature, music, watching my niece, writing, spending time with family, walking in a bookstore, celebrating the good things, reflecting on memories, driving through Sunset Point on the way to Arcosanti, excitement without the possibility or thoughts of the possibility of disappointment, and so on.