4.18.2010

Bliss

All I want to do is watch movies with the special one. I keep thinking of all these movies I want to show him and watch over again. I can't stop thinking about it. That's my bliss at the moment. I just want summer to come and to enjoy free time doing anything and nothing at all.
It doesn't help that he's been at Coachella all weekend and the act of missing him just keeps increasing. However, it is completely adorable and smile inducing that he keeps sporadically texting me randomness or quotes from his experience at Coachella. It gives me little glimpses into that world as if I was there with him. This further reiterates points made in He's Just Not That Into You; that if he really wanted to talk to you, he just would. I was not expecting him to do so at all, so it just makes me all the more appreciative. It amuses me how much I didn't expect to miss him as much as I do [and not to mention how weird it feels to say such things. Wow, when was the last time I ever felt this way?]. Well, I guess I've seen him at least every weekend for the past month.
Since he has been at Coachella, I was thinking back on the one time I went in 2006. I was still in high school then, and I went with my cousin. We weren't all that social then and we were minors as well. I can't say that my Coachella experience was as awesome as I would of liked or expected. However, thinking about the timing, the reasons for going, and our age and all those variables is a lot why that was so. I know now, I would enjoy Coachella a hell of a lot more. And I'm further regretting not going these past years. This year however, I'm totally broke and I have had to work all weekend. I will definitely keep myself updated on next year's event.
Since I'm on the subject, I want to remind you of the horribly lonely dream I had a couple mornings ago. I thought it was so strange that I had that dream the day he left, although the dream didn't actually directly involve him. It did involve a lover/potential lover and the loss of him. Like my subconscious knew...knew he was gone. It's really bizarre.

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