Eruption

I hate this building pressure in my chest.

I hate being nervous all the time.

I hate deciding not to finish my thoughts.

I hate this fear of my future combined with an unexplainable calm.

I hate the thought of ever possibly hurting someone.

I hate that I'd rather hurt myself.

I hate not being in control of various aspects of my life.

I hate my excuses.

I hate that the concerns have basis.

I hate my health.

I hate that growing up is still surprising me.

I love that I can listen to that song on repeat and let it wash over me.

I love that I have this deep knowledge that I will be okay.

I love that I have people who care and love me, that will take me in.

I love that I still have a deep love for others.

I love that I still have a home and my family is alive.

I love that some day I will aspire to what I want.

I love that I can still be held.

I love that I'm still not even half jaded.

I love the enlightenment that paints everyday.

I love that I'm growing up.

I love myself. Despite it all.