After

talking to a few people in my life I've realized, and have additions to my own self discovery, of how much of an 'individual' I am. 2 people particularly pointed this out. They, or more so, she said that I know exactly who I am and what I want. When people tell me that, I'm surprised, because usually I think the same about the people who tell me that first hand. But today, it's different. I notice, along with the help of another 2 peoples' brief words that it's true. That is how I am. That is how I represent myself, without even knowing. It's so goddamn refreshing to hear such words about the person that I am. It makes so much sense now. I've always known who I was, but I've also always been curious how others view me. Not because I wholly care about how they feel me, but because I'm completely curious how I appear in their eyes, when I'm so wrapped up in how I know who I am. It's rather interesting. I've always had this desire to be an open book to people, because I find the comfort in others predicting me, knowing how I would feel and react in any given situation. I like it, I take that as the person genuinely pays attention to me and cares. But then again, there's not a single person that knows all of me.
I have this obsession with details, I have to explain things so thoroughly that the listener doesn't hear one simple phrase an assumes one thing, when I feel the need to go through it and explain every detail and every aspect so you know exactly where I'm coming from. I frustrate myself with that a lot. I have this strange idea that I'm different, that everything through my eyes is different from everyone else's. Hell, my hearing condition doesn't help the fact that my language building and understanding was at a different pace and still to this day, I have my own interpretations on words and I, guess I, just stick with them. Fuck, I'm rambling, but there's just so much to myself than I have the time to explain...