Philosophy

Before I begin, I must say that my whole heart goes out to Nellie and her loving family. I haven't cried like that in awhile.
It gave me flashbacks to the exact situation I was in over a year ago. Seems to be the theme lately, and it bothers me far more than all the "unexpected" celebrity deaths that seems to cause everyone to be so down. My friend recently put her dog down. Another good friend's cat has a shattered femur and may need euthanasia as well. It's all so depressing. But enough on that for today.

Despite that I've been thinking profoundly on literally anything and everything, I'm sure my brain is mush. Every single thing provokes me. I'm in this utter dreamer land. Like I have a philosopher living in my head. I keep doing it, even while I'm writing: I stare upwards, angling my head and eyes a bit, with a grin and let the philosophy flow. Although I've stated that I go in and out of phases of high volume thought content, mental and intellectual stimulation, I feel this is the strongest phase yet. There is a single pro and con to all of this. The pro is that all of this stimulation and creativity is persisting at all. I know that is at least greatly in part because I am out of school. I've said it a million times how being in school gives me a sort of painter's block, because I just can't get as much inspiration nor to I ever have the time to paint. So school often blocked my creativity, although I will never rule out the fact that it does count for a considerable percentage of my inspiration. It's just the stress and the workload that greatly interferes with my being able to enjoy the luxury of creative thought. The con, is as already mentioned, my mind is probably some sort of mush. I haven't been in school...haven't been reading up, studying, or refreshing myself of any of my past studies. I don't particularly like that. I don't want to forget it or lose touch with any of it.
Needless to say, there's some things I need to work on in my life. I'm still in some sort of lagging hole. And it really bothers me.

“People who lean on logic and philosophy and rational exposition end by starving the best part of the mind.” -William Butler Yeats