I am a muse. And I will not allow myself to be anything less.
I wrongly nicknamed an old best friend "Muse". More accurate would be that she was a Siren and a whore. I'm not being petty, but merely stating a fact. Although she did not lure men [and women] with her voice, it was her looks and her ability to talk about anything if she chose to. I fell under her spell just as anyone else did. She used me up, just like I witnessed her do to countless others. She wasn't a Muse for inspiration, but a Muse for attention, money, and destruction. Nah, she wasn't a Scorpio, but a Virgo. It didn't help that she has a twin either. The world doesn't need women and men like her. The end of our friendship was as messy and heart-wrenching as a break up, maybe worse. My heart still races when I think of her and when I hear about her. I had no intentions to write about my friendship [or end of my friendship] with her, but I cannot escape such a thought when the word 'muse' comes into play. As much as I love the word, I still think of her every time I hear it. I also think about how I regret giving her such a valuable name. Reason 138902 why I have difficulties giving compliments. I guess I had to get this all out of the way first.
Back to more positive thoughts. On top of my interests, habit, and love for profound intensive
intellectual conversations with others, I make a muse of myself, unintentionally of course. I bring something really significant out of each and every person whom I have these experiences with. I am a muse for them [and you, perhaps], while the entire universe is my muse.
Yet, as flattering and astonishing and exciting this process is, it also doesn't surprise me. It's normal for me, but I'm still that humble and intensely curious person that I always have to dig deeper. And on the surface, I am somehow surprised anyways.
“Spend time every day listening to what your muse is trying to tell you” -Saint Bartholomew
“Health is the first muse, and sleep is the condition to produce it” -Ralph Waldo Emerson
“The most potent muse of all is our own inner child.” -Stephen Nachmanovitch
2 comments:
"She wasn't a Scorpio, but a Virgo." This might be a little ignorant, but are Virgos prone to the things you listed? (Curious since I'm a Virgo, but I have no idea what that means.)
No, Virgos don't typically have those qualities, although they seem to be prevalent in some of the female Virgos I've known. What I was describing actually sounds much like a typical 'evil' Scorpio [as opposed to a 'good' Scorpio]. Virgo males are one of the signs I'm most fond of, so I don't think you need to be worried.
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