Time to Myself

I think it's time to end something. Something that has only been going on for a rather short time, but maybe that was all I could take. I'm not meant for this kind of thing. Plain and simple. I wish I could drill that in my head and actually stick with it. I'm a "all or nothing" kind of person. I think that was finally confirmed to me. Gray areas don't work for me. Physical relationships don't work for me. I guess I was just trying to convince myself that it was. I'm too obsessive for this kind of thing. What I really need, is to focus on school, as lame and annoying as it sounds, it's the truth. It's the only real priority that I have for myself. Sadly I'm already slacking, from day fucking one of this semester. I don't know how to balance a partner and school. I don't even know how to go about learning how to do so. Glitch in my brain. If I were to need any help in life, that would be where it would be needed. I need to stop revolving myself around others. I need to remember how to think for myself and for what I really want...my mind is completely obscured at the moment. Those brief moments where I feel one way, I interpret it as stupid or an overreaction maybe, but I think those are the instinctual gut feelings that I should really be following rather than ignoring. Maybe that is why I keep finding myself in this same position. I keep finding excuses and reasons to stay in that spot, that's fear. Fear of change, fear of drasticity? [Yeah, I just made up a word] Some things/parts are nice, but as a whole, not nice enough.
I remember this feeling.